Therapy Hangovers

Therapy is supposed to make you feel better, right? 

There’s a misconception that online therapy is this fabulous, instant fix to your problems and that you’ll leave your session transformed, so when you leave a session feeling worse than you did going in it can straight up leave you going “well…. what the f*ck?” 

This is a conversation I have had on both sides and I understand firsthand just how disheartening it can feel, so before you spiral into “is therapy not working, is something wrong with me, do I just give up” let me introduce you to the Therapy Hangover. 

Imagine you’ve just run a marathon. It’s pretty likely you’ll experience one of these outcomes: 

1. PUMPED full of feel good endorphins, ready to ride the high and take on anything, already signing up for the next one
2. Pretty proud of yourself for doing it, feel like there were parts you could have done better in but open to giving it another go, a bit tired and sore – ready to rest and recover
3. Oh god whose idea was this, everything hurts, I still can’t breathe, is it acceptable to sleep in the shower?
4. Feel amazing and super proud of yourself right after, then wake up the next day feeling like you’ve been hit by a train

Surprise – therapy is an emotional workout of its own. No matter what we need appropriate rest and recovery, and while we know it’s good for us in the long run there will be times where it makes us feel pretty worse for wear. 

So what actually is a Therapy Hangover? 

Much like a conventional hangover, Therapy Hangovers are that unexpected wave of emotions and exhaustion that can occur after a therapy session; whether that’s right after, a few hours later, or even the next morning. You might feel completely drained, withdrawn or irritable, emotionally raw, or just off; and it can manifest in physical symptoms like headaches, nausea and muscle tension too. 

It can be incredibly confusing to be working really hard towards bettering yourself and instead feeling pretty awful, but this is actually a very normal part of the process for a lot of us. 

What causes a Therapy Hangover?

You could experience a Therapy Hangover after your first session or your hundredth, or you might never feel like it’s something that applies to you. Therapy Hangovers are predominantly contributed to by emotional processing, cognitive overload, and nervous system response. Therapy can bring up complex feelings, traumas and unresolved issues, and the deep self-reflection we go through to address these and challenging existing beliefs or behaviours can be mentally exhausting. Working through difficult feelings or even mentally re-living traumatic situations can trigger a heightened emotional state or stress response, such as fight, flight or freeze.

Unfortunately, all of this doesn’t always just end when the session does. So when we leave our session already vulnerable, emotional, mentally overloaded and a bit anxious, it checks out that we aren’t always going to suddenly return to the world like nothing happened.

Dealing with Therapy Hangovers

We can’t always predict when we might experience a Therapy Hangover, but there are some simple strategies we can use to reduce their impact and manage them better: 

1. Give yourself time to decompress after a session.

If you can, try to schedule your session with extra space to sit with your feelings afterwards rather than launching right back into work or your to-do list. 

2. Try not to rush onto the next thing straight away.

Try some easy movement, journaling or doing something calming after your sessions. Create a post-therapy ritual like getting yourself a sweet treat as a little reward for yourself.

3. Grounding yourself.

A little grounding after a session is a good way to feel more calm, regulated, and bring yourself back into the present moment. Try things like breathing exercises, meditation and mindfulness – or talk through some suggestions with your therapist.

4. Fuel yourself.

Maybe forgo the greasy hash brown and gatorade cure, but hydrating and eating something nourishing after your session is a good way to refuel your body and mind after emotional processing. 

5. Let someone know how you are feeling.

If you’re comfortable doing so, this can make a huge difference. A little extra understanding and compassion from the people around you can go a long way. They don’t need any details, a simple “I had a therapy session today and I’m feeling pretty raw” is enough. 

If the hangovers become frequent

If Therapy Hangovers are a more frequent occurrence, affecting your ability to return to daily life after sessions, or making you hesitant to be as vulnerable, let your therapist know. Sharing your experience creates space to explore strategies to ease the emotional toll – whether that’s incorporating something into your sessions (like guided breathing or mindfulness) or creating personalised post-session coping tools with your therapist. Being open with your therapist about these feelings will also help to identify if your “Therapy Hangovers” are disguising a more serious issue, like emotional dysregulation or depression, that requires further support or investigation. 

You’re doing “ the work”

While they do suck, Therapy hangovers are actually a sign that you’re doing the work! It means your brain is processing and adjusting. Over time, they often become less intense as you build emotional resilience and establish better coping strategies. Just remember they are a normal part of the process, and you don’t have to suffer through them in silence.